Monday, December 31, 2012

Caring About How We Think in Destructive Relationships

Researchers of cognition estimate that we experience upwards to 60,000 automatic thoughts a day, and for most of us 80% of our contemplations are negative. These negative thoughts are repetitive ideas that we continuously tell ourselves throughout our lives. They are primarily formed from experiences with feelings and actions in our family environment and intimate relationships. They are not facts and are often not accurate reflections of reality. Especially when our family communication patterns are destructive and our intimate relationships are abusive. Our inner dialogue has a strong effect on emotional states, actions, and how we cope with life.

Imagine you have a problem with a partner that you are trying to cope with. You could think, "This is not about me, I can manage, even though it is difficult," or, you could think, "This is hopeless, there is nothing I can do right, I'm completely overwhelmed and it's impossible to make a change." How might you feel, think, or act differently in these situations? If you feel anger or resentment, the challenge is to acknowledge it, learn from it, and then release any self-destructive thoughts.

Thoughts can affect your reactions to your partner's emotional abuse and your ability to cope with it too. In particular, thinking his or her abusive behavior is about you. Participating in the emotional cruelty with your partner is likely to make you feel more helpless to change and to suffer more. In contrast, thinking that makes you feel competent to cope with the relationship can make you feel better about yourself and empower you to change the circumstances. When you feel misery, force yourself to think grateful thoughts. When you feel blamed, reassure yourself that who you are is okay.

Thoughts often seem to be out of our control. Even so, the truth is that we can learn to monitor our thinking, notice thoughts that are more or less helpful, and make choices about how to counter or change those thoughts. By doing these things, we reduce thoughts that contribute to feelings of helplessness and hopelessness and increase thoughts that contribute to feelings of competence, confidence, and determination. These thoughts can then help you a) act more effectively with your partner and b) stop creating your own emotional pain c) help you leave your relationship. This also helps you make emotionally fulfilling choices like spending time with loved ones, accomplishing your work or educational goals, or reducing the negative effects of your abusive partner.

The three steps to changing your thinking are to:

1. Notice your thoughts (if you are feeling bad, you know you're thinking disempowering thoughts).

2. Ask yourself, "Is the thought helpful or harmful. Is it accurate?"

3. Change your thought, if harmful or inaccurate; counter it with a positive coping thought and behavior.

Thoughts can be empowering thoughts or self-defeating thoughts. They can be thoughts that reinforce you to believe in your value or thoughts that punish you for being or making a mistake. Looking at your own relationship experiences, which types of thoughts are most likely to be helpful? Where does your mind hang out? Make a list of these inner dialogues to help you notice the thoughts that make you feel bad. This action will help you to stop attending to the seemingly involuntary thought processes and the continuous negative monologues.

Questions to ask for empowering coping thoughts are:

1. Am I blaming myself for something over which I do not have control?

2. Are there any strengths or positives in me or the situation that I am ignoring?

3. Have I had any experiences that show that this thought is completely true all the time?

4. If a friend had this thought, what would I tell him or her?

5. Have I been in this type of situation with my partners before? What happened? Is there anything different between this situation and previous ones?

6. What have I learned from prior experiences that could help me now?

These actions will help you in destructive relationships and can help you get through times of stress in healthy relationships. Listen to that voice in your head and do what you need to do to take care of your thoughts.

Thank you for reading this article. I've dedicated my personal and professional life to the importance of non-violence and self-compassion by teaching from my experience. As a result, I've learned a lot about what it takes to put an end to the self-judgment and critical thoughts. And, as I learn and grow, I teach self-acceptance and give advice I use myself, in the hopes that it helps you to improve your own life.



This article is brought to you by MATCHMAKING.

Your Anniversary Is the Perfect Time to Rekindle the Passion in Your Relationship

Anniversaries are those special days in a couple's lives where they get to reminisce about the years past and show each other how much they cherish those years and how much they look forward to many more to come. They are those days that prove a couple's commitment and loyalty to one another, and their proof of surpassing the trials that other couples have failed to surpass. Yes, anniversaries really deserve to be celebrated because they show and prove how couples can survive years of being together and that they are capable of staying in harmony and in love for that long.

In general, there are a lot of different ways in which a couple can celebrate their anniversary. If you have only been together for a couple of years, then you might want to celebrate your anniversary privately for now. You can spend the day together, get away from work for a while, cook special meals for one another, or just look through pictures of the previous years that you have spent together. These things in themselves can easily rekindle the passion in your relationship. Since everything is still quite fresh in your relationship, though, you might not need to rekindle anything just yet.

However, if you have been with your partner for many years now, you might want to do something more grandiose during your anniversaries to successfully rekindle the passion in your relationship and ensure that you have many more years to look forward to together. Now, this may require some money and some preparation, but you need to remember that you deserve these celebrations to honor your commitment to one another and to rekindle the passion in your relationship. If you have other people to thank for your fruitful relationship, you can invite close friends and relatives to your celebrations, too.

There are just some common ways in which you can celebrate your anniversaries to rekindle the passion in your relationship at the same time. It would be important to remember that a good anniversary doesn't necessarily pertain to one that was attended by a lot of people or one that cost a lot of money, though. It has nothing to do with the ideals that society has set or what friends or relatives suggest or dicta, either. The only important thing is that you keep your intimacy intact and enjoy one another's company on your special day.



This article is brought to you by MATCH.

6 Online Dating Tips That Really Work

Getting online dating tips gives you an opportunity of getting the best out of dating. Is perhaps one of the most difficult forms of dating available. Not only do you date someone you have not seen before but you are also required to make up your mind on whether you would want to take the relationship to the next level by meeting the person. It does offer a platform for people to meet different people. The following online dating tips will help you get the best out of your online dating experience. These online dating tips have been tried and tested and found to provide the best results.

Tip 1 - Get in the right mind frame: Before you even register on any dating site be sure that you know exactly what you want. Never enter an online chat room without first knowing exactly what kind of person you are looking for. Write down the qualities of the person you are looking for. If you ask any dating expert this is perhaps one of the best online dating tips to start with.

Tip 2 - Go out of your way to look good: This is perhaps one of the best online dating tips I have ever been given. Remember that the even though you are dating a person online eventually you will have to meet them. The main aim of this is to eventually meet the person you are dating online. Go out of your way to join a gym, groom yourself e.t.c to look nice for your date.

Tip 3 - Be truthful: When coming up with your dating profile always be truthful about everything. Never lie about your profile as it only gives an impression of a person you are not. When it comes to online dating tips, the truth about you should always come first.

Tip 4 - Meet in a public area: Remember that this is a person you have never met before therefore for you own safety meet the person in a public are that you feel safe in. When it comes to meeting girls online, your safety always comes first so never neglect it.

Tip 5 - Sex on the first date is a big no: Of all the online dating tips available, this is perhaps one of the most relevant once. Never have sex with a person you have just met on the internet on the first date. Not only does it give them a bad impression of you but it also makes the relationship untenable in the long run. Sex is a good thing but if it is rushed into without the required commitment it can break a good relationship. Always thrive to first build relationship before you are able to move into intimacy.

Tip 6 - The man should always pay the bill: This is one of the crucial online dating tips that every man should take into consideration. If you are a man never ask your date to pay for the date as it gives them the wrong impression of you. Taking care of the bill will always give you an upper hand.

The above online dating tips will always ensure that you get the best out of your online dating. Always have fun while dating. These online dating tips provide a good avenue for people dating online to make the best out of the experience.



This news article is brought to you by MUSIC UNITED 1 - where latest news are our top priority.

7 New Year's Resolutions for Couples (YES, for Couples - Try It!)

Do couples ever make resolutions for their relationship?

Here at the time of New Year's Resolutions, and at any time, it sure seems like a good ides for couples to make resolutions for their relationship.

To that end, here are 7 suggestions for Couple Resolutions:

1) Remember first attractions - It's so easy in the general messiness of living with another person to forget about what attracted you to each other in the first place. This would be a good list to make and a good conversation to have every know and then.

It's been said by my favorite author (Author Unknown) that "When you are up to your neck in alligators, it's hard to remember the original objective was to drain the swamp."This applies here big time.

2) Fight for relationship - Couples fight sometimes. That's just part of the territory. So since you are going to fight, why not decide in advance what to for, yes? I suggest fighting for the relationship. Most folks fight to be right. Fight for the relationship.

3) Live below your means - Now I've gone from preaching to meddling, right? The happiest couples I know are not necessarily the richest couples I know. The happiest couples I know are those without significant money worries. The best way to achieve this is to live below your means.

4) Know love language - In what way does your partner best experience and feel loved? Is it actions like acts of service? Is it words? Is it being touched?

The best way to find out is to ask.

5) Speak love language - Once you know the love language of your partner, speak it. Radical notion I know, but it works. The temptation is to speak in our own love language. Often that is not the language of our partner. Know it and speak it.

6) Daily time together - I don't care if it's just 15 minutes. Couple need this time to keep the connection strong. In the hustle and bustle of each day, couple time is often the first thing to go. Schedule it if you have to, just make sure you get it in.

7) Regular date night - This could be the best couple resolution of all. You dated when you were getting together. Why stop? A regular date night allows you to spend quality couple time together, and gives you something to look forward to each week or month.

Sunday, December 30, 2012

Why Are More Single Women Seeking Men Online?

The world of online dating has become very popular to the point where more single ladies are looking for men than what people saw years ago. Whether or not online dating is going to complete take the place of physical dating in the future is unknown but it is clear that many single women looking for men are going online for doing so. There are several reasons why all these women are doing so.

One point involves how easy it can be for single women seeking men to find specific men online. The challenge of going someplace to find single men can be frustrating. Going online is often easier to do because the best men out there will be listed on different online dating websites. It makes it a little easier for women to take a look at what they can get.

It's often enjoyable to take a look at other men online as well. Single women can find men and send them special messages through an online dating platform. They can also take a look at different photos and videos of men doing all sorts of things. Women can even share their own photos and videos if they want to. This is done to make the dating scene a little more fun.

There is a need for any single lady to make sure that she knows what she is getting into when it comes to dating another man. That's why it is such a necessity to take a look at the online dating scene when finding someone.

Online dating allows people to get in touch with each other for an extended period of time without any serious boundaries in the way. Many women looking for men use this to mingle with men online and to see what makes them interesting. This can be done through private chats and even video chats depending on what is being used. Either way, a great solution can be made to make anyone feel a little more comfortable when finding other people.

The safety of online dating is something that many single girls look for. The problem with going out some place for dating is that it can be a very risky venture. This includes not only problems relating to dangerous locations for dates but also problems with men being abusive or harmful on these dates.

Getting to know each other online has clearly become a necessity when it comes to dating. It is done to get all people to see what they have to offer in a controlled environment without any pressure from any side during the date.

These are great reasons why so many single ladies go online to find men. Women who look for men online use different online dating services to do more than just find singles. They can do this to help you screen different potential dates in order to get a better idea of who might be more interesting for what a woman wants to get out of a man.



This news article is brought to you by CELEBRITY GOSSIP NEWS - where latest news are our top priority.

Relationship Advice - How To End An Abusive Relationship

As a rule, not too many people like the thought of being alone. But, at the same time, no one deserves to spend their life in an abusive relationship. Life is simply too short to waste with a partner who does not appreciate you for who you are and what you have to offer a healthy relationship. But getting out of an abusive relationship can be tricky unless you know just what to do and when to carry it out. That's why it is important to know the best and safest way to end an abusive relationship.

First, is to identify how the relationship is abusive so you know what you are up against. Abuse can be:

  • physical,
  • sexual,
  • psychological,
  • emotional,
  • verbal, or
  • any combination thereof.

Why is it important to understand what kind of abuse you are enduring? Because it helps to dictate your exit strategy.

For instance, if the abuse is physical, once you make a break it has to be a complete one where you will no longer be in their presence. They can't hurt you if they can't touch you. If it is verbal, stop all forms of communication. If they want to talk to you, it will have to be in the presence of others. If it is emotional or psychological in nature, then let them know as soon as the insults or negative comments start, all they will hear is a dial tone.

Second, is to understand once you have made the decision to leave... you have to stick with it. As soon as you notify your partner of your plans, one of two things is going to happen. Either they will try to:

  • sweet-talk you into staying by promising you their undying loyalty, being on their best behavior and promising to end all abusive behavior, or
  • they will threaten you with more abuse if you carry out your "threat".

Third, you need to be strong. If you make the decision to end the relationship with your abuser, you have to be willing to back it up or it will be unbearable for you to stay. You will need to be strong to get out of the relationship... and to stay out. Plus, this inner strength will serve you well as you begin your life without your abuser.

Fourth, is to find strength in others. Once you leave, your abuser might try to lure you back. They will try to play off of your emotions by using their overbearing personality. Make sure to surround yourself with friends and family who know what is best for you and can help to support you in your decision.



This news article is brought to you by CELEBRITY GOSSIP NEWS - where latest news are our top priority.

Saturday, December 29, 2012

How to Win Back an Ex Boyfriend - 3 Ways to Stop Being a Needy Woman

When you're trying to figure out how to win back an ex boyfriend one of the first things you need to do is to stop being clingy and needy. A needy ex girlfriend is such a turn off and the only result you're going to get is having your ex disgusted with you.

If you want to know how to win back an ex boyfriend, here are a few tips to remember to stop yourself from being a needy ex girlfriend.

Regain your confidence

It's not easy to build your confidence when you got dumped. But if you want your ex to notice you again, you're going to have to suck it up and slowly regain your self-esteem. You're not going to get his attention if you mope around all day in your room. When you're confident, it shows that you don't need him around to boost your ego and you will become more independent and less needy.

One way to do this is to learn to live your life again. How do you do this?

· Spend time with your friends

· Find new things that can keep occupied

· Do the things you enjoy doing

· Workout, go shopping, and change your appearance to help you feel good about yourself

Avoid calling him all the time

If you're a needy woman then you would be trying to contact your ex all the time. If he doesn't answer the phone, then you'll send him text messages and emails. You just don't know when to stop. Contacting him multiple times a day will not win him back. You're on a break right now and you're only pushing him further away with your phone calls. He may have several reasons for not calling you:

· He's been too busy to get back to you

· He forgot to respond to your emails and calls because there's just too many of them

· He doesn't know how to respond and what to say to you

· He doesn't want to talk to you yet and you need to take a hint and maybe just back off for now

The last one seems harsh but it can also be the closest to the truth. After all, you're on a break right now and maybe he doesn't feel like talking to you. He needs more time and you need to respect that.

Being paranoid in the relationship

When the two of you were still together, were you always paranoid about the relationship ending? If he forgot to say "I love you," did you worry that maybe this is the end? This could be one of the reasons why he left you. You're being too needy and paranoid and you always need to be reassured that you're not going to be left alone. Other signs that you're being paranoid include:

· You're always hungry for his attention

· You always want to be by his side

· You try to be controlling and act as if you own him

· You don't like it when he spends too much time with his friends

· You don't think he loves you as much as you love him

You need to change this attitude and try to become a stronger individual. This is essential when it comes to "how to win back an ex boyfriend." He's not going to want to come back to a needy woman so you need to prove to him that you're making the effort to change.



This news article is brought to you by WOMEN'S BLOG - where latest news are our top priority.

How to Approach Women - 3 Mistakes That Men Make When They Approach a Woman

Approaching women is not the easiest thing to do for most guys. When I say approaching a woman, I'm not just talking about walking up to her and saying hi and then walking away. I mean being able to walk up to her, get her talking and flirting back and forth with you and hopefully being able to land a date with her if she happens to be single. That's what most men seem to have a lot of trouble with and if you don't ever get to a point where you can approach a woman and get some sparks flying between you and her, there is a good chance that you are going to end up being single and frustrated.

So, in order to get the approach down right, you really should know some mistakes that men make quite a bit that you can avoid so that you do end up making a good first impression. Remember, in most situations, that first impression is ALL that you get. It's good to make sure that you do get it right.

Here are 3 mistakes that men make quite frequently when they approach a woman that you don't want to make:

1) They walk up to a woman looking like they have no confidence at all and they expect her to reject them.

You see this happen all of the time at clubs and bars. A guy will push himself to make an approach, or his friends will egg him on, but he doesn't really have the confidence that things will go well. So, as he walks over to that woman, his body language is saying that he expects her to reject him and that is an impression that you don't want to give off. Walk with confidence and assume that you DO have a chance with her.

2) They use an opener that screams out, I'm trying to pick you up.

Outside of those cheesy frat boy style movies, coming across like you are trying to pick up a woman is almost always going to be a big mistake. That doesn't mean that you shouldn't try to pick up a woman, it just means that it can't come across like that is what you are trying to do. Use an opener that makes it seem like you really want to talk to her and get to know her.

3) They don't know how to transition beyond the opener.

You can't just approach a woman and drop a line on her and then expect that you've done enough to make her want to go out on a date with you. You have to be able to move beyond the opener and build both attraction and rapport with your conversation. Otherwise, the odds that you will be going out with her or at least getting her number are not that good at all.

Improving Your Relationship With Your Girlfriend - 3 Tips to Make Things Better

So, you have found the woman that you want to be with and you are in a relationship with her, but you want to know what you can do to make things better than they already are. You know that improving your relationship with your girlfriend can only be a good thing and you are well aware of the possibility that things could end up going south one day and you could end up losing her if you don't make sure that you are doing all of the things that you can in order to make things get better and better with her.

Here are 3 tips that are going to help you do just that, so pay attention:

1) Don't try to solve her problems when she just wants you to listen to them.

This is one of the classic mistakes that guys will make when they are in a relationship. Their girlfriend will want to vent about an issue and instead of just sitting back and listening to what she has to say, you wind up trying to solve things and as a result, she doesn't feel like you are really listening to her. Sometimes, women just want their boyfriend to listen and they are not looking for you to solve their problem.

2) Try to be as spontaneous as you can.

When you stop doing things that surprise her, that is when she might start to get the feeling that things are getting kind of stale in the relationship. That's obviously not a feeling that you want your girlfriend to have, so make sure that it doesn't happen by being as spontaneous as you can. Surprise her with a gift for no reason or take her to a concert that she really wants to go to without a whole lot of notice. Just do something that keeps some of that spontaneity alive in the relationship.

3) Make sure that you keep her feeling satisfied in the bedroom.

All guys want to believe that they have no problems at all when it comes to the bedroom, but the reality is that most men end up leaving their girlfriend feeling a little less than satisfied more often than they know about. This is an area that you want to make sure that you are taking care of, so ask her for her honest opinion if she is willing to give it. That way, you aren't just guessing at how she feels about your sex life and you'll know if you can improve things a little bit.



This article is brought to you by FREE PERSONALS.

Friday, December 28, 2012

I Want Her Back But She's Giving Me Mixed Signals

Getting and trying to interpret mixed signals from a woman is probably one of the hardest things that a man can do. Even guys that have been living with a woman for years will still sometimes have a lot of difficulty when that woman seems to be giving them mixed signals. If you feel like your ex girlfriend is the one that happens to be giving you those mixed signals... it can be extremely frustrating if you are trying to interpret what she means and if you really do have a chance of getting her back. Let's try to make that a little bit easier to deal with.

ARE YOU SEEING WHAT YOU WANT TO SEE OR ARE YOU SEEING REALITY?

The first thing that you need to think about if you feel like your ex girlfriend is giving you mixed signals is to try and figure out whether or not you are just seeing what you want to see or if you are seeing what is really going on. What I mean by that is, do you think she is giving you mixed signals because you want to believe that she wants you back or is it because they are REALLY there?

The mind is funny and it can easily see what it wants to see. So, if you really want your ex girlfriend back, it can be easy to take things that don't really mean a thing and give it meaning. Sometimes guys will talk about mixed signals from their ex girlfriend when the reality is that the signal is really clear... she doesn't want a thing to do with them and they just don't want to see that reality.

BE PATIENT AND DON'T REACT TOO QUICKLY -

If you really are getting mixed signals from your ex girlfriend, you want to try and be patient and don't react too quickly. This might just be a situation where she isn't really sure on what she wants and if you react too quickly and your reaction happens to be the wrong one - you could end up pushing her away when you could have had her back if you were a little more patient and waited things out a bit.

The other thing that you want to do is to try and work on making your ex girlfriend feel more attraction towards you. That way, if she needs a little pushing, the attraction will make her lean towards the idea of getting back together with you and not in moving on without you.



This news article is brought to you by TAXES BLOG - where latest news are our top priority.

How to Attract Ladies in Online Dating

Using online dating websites is the most efficient way to meet new women, if done correctly. Three things will determine your success with internet dating.

- Persistence

- First messages sent to women (openers)

- Your profile

Success with women (especially online) is a numbers game. You must work the law of averages. You must be persistent when sending out messages to women and not let frustration cause you to get negative, bitter or quit.

Frustration can kill your chances with the ladies. But if you're persistent, consistent and remain positive, you'll hook up with several ladies via cyberspace.

The best thing about internet dating is that once you've connected with women online, and they want to meet up with you... roughly 1 out of 3 girls will get intimate with you on the first date.

Creating your online profile is the second important aspect. You must have photos on your profile. At least 3 photos. I suggest you have a non-smiling image as your main photo, then two or more of you with friends or doing something that you're passionate about.

PHOTO #1 - Use a non-smiling photo because studies have shown that women find men with a serious face, more physically attractive than a smiling/happy face.

That reminds me of a quote I once read:

"You can not be sexy if you smile, you can not be a rebel if you grin" - Elvis Presley

PHOTO #2 - Show a photo with you being social with friends. This will help women know that you're a normal guy with a social life. (Very important for online dating)

PHOTO #3 - Show you're doing something cool. A hobby or something you're passionate about. Keep the written section of your profile short, sweet and to the point. You want to hook girl's attention and get their curiosity going.

Avoid writing anything like this:

Hello, my name Jim. I like to travel, read books and go to bars. I'm new to online dating and I'm just here to try it out and see what happens

= boring. Unoriginal. Just like everyone else.

The three keys to online dating success is using interesting and unique message openers that cause women to write you back. The average guy on an internet dating site will message a hot girl and write something like this:

"Hey, what's up? I read your profile and I think you're hot. What's your name?"

= Boring! I'm just like everyone else.

You on the other hand sending out messages like this:

Why do you look familiar... ?

- Jim

(insert your first name)

This simple message is amazing because it:

- creates curiosity

- it's different

- it's short

- it's a question... causes her to answer your back

- you give her your first name

If you decide to use online dating, I suggest you message at least 10 new women each day for 30 straight days.



This news article is brought to you by SHOCKING DATING ADVICE - where latest news are our top priority.

Here Are 3 Simple Steps To Approach Women Anywhere

Approaching is the beginning of every little thing. If you can't determine the approach, regardless of exactly how good the remaining of your game will be, you are screwed. In this posting I'm going to provide several practical along with tested tips so you'll understand how to approach women of all ages anywhere. Lots of tips is very distinct with a specific location as being a nightclub or even in the gym, nevertheless you will find principles that will underlie almost any successful strategy along with they are just what I will reveal to you.

Step one - Approaching women of all ages with the appropriate mentality

Think about there is a wonderful gal that is the fantastic type, an individual have a look at the lady and have another or so associated with vision call, you wish to discuss to the lady, nevertheless, you do not, and an individual is currently there freezing as well as the second journeys. Think of the technique that you could feel as conditions. Right think about the similar conditions nevertheless of this event an individual technique along with her statements "sorry I'm busy" along with transforming missing. Think of exactly how you would feel the following. Does one feeling fantastic you actually had the baseballs to achieve the idea? Does one feeling fantastic you no less than discovering out whether or not it definitely was in or even definitely not?

Right now think about an individual technique along with almost everything goes completely along with you end up having lied or even which has a wedding with this gal (different shots intended for various folks). Just how can you feel therefore? And so at this factor, assume an individual technique 100 females along with determine a very likely possibilities associated with success. Throughout what variety of can you get a variance? 20%? 60%? Whatever it is, it's very likely sufficient to make the concept value doing. Just how much think you would research from 100 approaches? And so at this factor, when you are as conditions you already know that while the benefits of nearing a lot exceeds definitely not nearing and you may technique just to avoid that will unwanted suffer from to be a wussy that will could not enhance.

2 - Be ready

The second factor is it being prepared. Basically the fact is this exclusive woman the other bursts straight into your head along with it's an ideal factor to form for just that will woman knowing that conditions. That is the most ideal. Most of the time though, your thoughts are going to be "blank" or even hurrying including different options that you throw one by one since insufficient. And so, choose one particular opening variety that you'll be assured with, used in many conditions (not basically just with the fitness center whenever she is on the property instructor going accurately 5mph) along with always have that will variety to be able to drop again in. Below are a few pickup openers you can try, pick the one particular you wanted to, along with keep in thoughts, the concept does not should be excellent, the concept basically just should be adequate.

3 - Your skeletal system process

Another element will be obtaining the skeletal system of any process set up so that you will know around where to start. Look at the doable tendencies for your cracking open range. Think of the method that you might expose oneself - "I'm Rich through the way", exactly how you can find the number "I visit some very nice get-together with the good friends, you must come someday along with check out one particular out there. Okay cool, but the variety during my telephone along with I'll text a person next occasion all of us proceed out", plus, in case the idea enables you to sense superior, methods to avoid if you need the idea - "it's recently been wonderful chatting with a person, nevertheless I must satisfy several good friends, what's the most effective way associated with preserving touching you".

So there you have it, 3 aspects you can do right away (hint - do it now!). I wish that gives you a better idea of how to approach women anywhere. Next we can focus more significantly on conversation capabilities, plans, and more impressive aspects.



This article is brought to you by ONLINE DATING.

A Few Tips, A Few Tricks on How to Find the Right Girl

When did meeting women and men become so hard? When you really need a girlfriend then there were times when you could have started a conversation out of thin air, now, as a man you need more than words... or do you?

By now, you have heard the words "she is the one" probably a million times. Well, here is a little truth. There is no right girl unless you turn her into the right one for you. Use these tips to help you find a girlfriend and escape the friend zone!

Body Language Says A Lot

First, you will need to be careful with your body language. Usually more than ninety percent of what we say does not come out of our lips but through our entire body. You need to be relaxed, in control, keep your head up, shoulders back, breath slowly and never face a woman you just met with your chest.

Remain in a neutral position because you do not want to look desperate and needy. If the room you are in is crowded, try as much as you can to give her the personal space she needs. Do not get too close from the first moment because she will get scared.

After you have the right position, you have to know what will come out of your mouth. Even if you are nervous, do not start shaking because your voice will shake as well. It does not matter if you are not attractive at all, there will be something about you, something irresistible.

Do not turn your torso in her direction because you will not get to open your mouth before you get rejected. This will show neediness and it will kill all the sexual attraction that was between you two up until that point.

Reading Her Body Language

If you want to start talking to a girl, pay attention to her body language and most of all, pay attention to her mouth. Do not look her in the eyes, not down her blouse, not around, just look at her mouth as if you would like to sip every word she gets out. While you look at her mouth, there is a high possibility she will be already thinking about sleeping with you. Her subconscious is a wonderful place, where your dreams might come true.

Knowing What To Look For

Before you start looking for a girlfriend, you need to know how you want her to be. You will be going out with hundreds of women before you realize which one might be the one for you, but at least you could enjoy this savage scout and make it fun. By the time you will have a wife, you will be able to know what she thinks, how she acts, which is her defense mechanism and the book will teach you how to make women faithful. She will never cheat on you or dump you, as long as you follow the step-by-step instructions.

Keep your eyes opened for lies. As many people and magazines said, women are looking for rich guys with thick hair and large muscles. Well, not true. Money has noting to do with love, bold men are sexier and muscles are overrated, so if you are an average guy, a normal person you will have the chance to find the right girl.

Understanding Pre-Selection

Now we have arrived to the fun part. People in general think that what does not belong to them is better, or what the majority wants is good. This does not necessarily have to be true, but in a woman's head, it all makes sense. What is pre-selection and how does it work?

  • Pre-selection is when you make her think about the aspect that other women are already chasing you. This pre-selection works hand in hand with the filter mechanism women have. With the help of that mechanism, all needy and weak men are sorted out.

  • On the other hand, you have the opposite mechanism called the approach mechanism. This mechanism will kick your subconscious behind if you do not dare to talk to a woman that attracts you.

  • Here is the thing, the two mechanisms are not compatible at all because with your mechanism, you make you look like a wuss and she will cut you off and filter you out of her life.

Using Jealousy As A Tool

If you are looking for a girlfriend, you should do some research about fish in the beginning. The females are usually looking for the males which have the brightest colors, not because they are handsome, or because they have more money and so on, but because they are healthier.

The female fish thinks that she wants healthy babies. However, when there are two fish that look alike, the female will choose the one that other females chose as well. They go for the male fish that has more fish swimming after him.

Women think just like the fish females, but the fact is that they do not know who are you mating with, or how many women are after you, according to your confidence they will have to guess. Sometimes they guess well, sometimes they kind of don't.

Meeting girls, especially new ones, is not hard at all. All you have to do is read, practice and become self-confident.



This article is brought to you by FREE DATING.

Thursday, December 27, 2012

The Other Language of Men

Let's be honest. Men can be cryptic, closed off and emotionally unavailable. Perhaps your guy is acting a little differently than usual and you're absolutely convinced that he's upset with you about something. Then you try to ask him about it and he swears that nothing is upsetting him. This can be a maddening scenario and it happens all the time! Guys are not that expressive, and if you badger them too much they can become angry and shut down even more. If only there was a man-to-English translation dictionary that you could use to understand what he's actually thinking.

Men do have a lot of tells, even if language is not one of them. There are, however, a lot of ways to figure out what he's thinking or feeling. For starters, pay attention to his physical expression instead of his verbal expression. A lot of women out there have no idea how to do this, so learning to read his body before his words can be a huge advantage in the dating world.

Check Out His Chest
And I'm not talking about looking for pecs! You can tell a lot about a guy's level of interest in a person or conversation based on the way he positions his torso. If he is facing you directly, with his shoulders and chest directly opposite yours, he is more than likely very interested in continuing to communicate with you. If he refuses to turn his torso to address you and instead just turns his head, it may be less likely that he wants to keep chatting with you.

Gauging His Gaze
Eye contact means a lot. A woman can find herself weak in the knees from a long, intimate gaze from a man. This can be because he is completely taken by you. This can also be because he is a guy who knows that women will fall for the eye contact trap! It is difficult to discern which is which when dealing with a new guy, and it can be disastrous if you come to the wrong conclusion and think a player is in it for the long haul. If anything about his gaze seems forced, it is a good idea to proceed with caution. If, however, you catch him throwing loving glances your way when you're not looking, it's a lot more likely that he's not just after sex and is infatuated with you.

Keep an Eye on His Eyes
It may not be easily defined, but you've no doubt seen the little glimmer in a man's eye when he hears something he truly likes. Whether it's when you suggest his favorite steakhouse for dinner or when he finds out you guys share a completely random hobby like collecting Elvis busts, it inevitably happens and will become easier to recognize as you get to know him. If you catch these little sparks frequently throughout your conversation, there is a good possibility that this relationship will continue onto a second, third and maybe fortieth date! Learn to recognize them and you will know what topics and behaviors really catch his attention, and you can easily use that knowledge to your advantage.

Building a Better Relationship With Your Girlfriend - 3 Tips for Men Who Want To Make It Work

When you feel like you have really found a woman you love and you feel like she is someone that you can really envision yourself being with for the long term, you want to make things work out. You don't want to end up making any mistakes that are going to drive her away. You don't want to end up losing her. So, it is a good thing to try and work on building a better relationship with your girlfriend. That way, you are doing all that you can to make sure that you don't end up losing her.

Here are 3 tips that are going to help you build a better relationship with your girlfriend so that things DO work out for you and her:

1. Don't allow things to get in the way of you and her spending time with one another.

If you live a busy life, it can be quite easy to find that you don't spend a whole lot of quality time with your girlfriend, even if you want to. However, just because it is easy to find yourself letting other things get in the way of spending that time you should spend with one another, it doesn't mean that it has to be that way. Make the time to do things as a couple that are going to help you and her feel like you really are connected, because that is your best defense against losing her.

2. Compliment her every now and again.

When the compliments come to a stop, that is usually when you'll find that a lot of little things turn into big arguments and you don't want that to happen. While you don't want to give your girlfriend so many compliments it turns into something that is annoying to her, you also don't want to give her none at all. Take the time to give her a compliment every now and again and mean it when you do.

3. Work on your communication skills if they seem to be weak.

It's okay to admit that you need to work on your communication skills when it comes to interacting with your girlfriend. A lot of men need to do that, yet not very many actually do take the time to work on developing those skills. You want to be one of the few who do, because the better you can communicate with one another, the less likely you are going to end up in one of those situations where the lack of communication is what ends the relationship.



This article is brought to you by FREE DATING SITE.

4 Things Women Should Always Put in Their Dating Profiles

Let's be honest - women don't need to do a whole lot on dating sites to generate plenty of attention from male suitors.

If you're a woman and you want to receive a regular stream of messages from men looking to get to know you better, all you need to do is put up a remotely flattering profile picture and fill out your profile in the most slap-dash and sparse manner possible.

As a woman, you don't really need to try if you want to meet men online.

Unfortunately, the types of men you'll meet online with a substandard profile probably aren't the sort of men you have any real interest in.

The goal isn't to simply meet men online. The goal is to meet great men online, and that takes a little work - like making sure you include the following items in your online profile.

1. Variety in your pictures.

When I say "variety," I don't mean 12 slightly different pictures you took one after another while sitting in front of your Mac in your bedroom.

You need to include different photos that showcase a different aspect of your personality and which demonstrate another positive value you bring to the men you date.

Before you add a photo to your profile, ask yourself what it says about you and whether another picture you've already posted conveys the same facet of your life.

A high-quality man wants to know you have a rich and full life, and pictures offer a great "show, don't tell" moment to prove just that.

2. Pictures showcasing what you really look like.

All photos in your profile need to be as recent as possible.

Also, make sure you include at least one photo that showcases what your face looks like up close and personal and at least one photo that clearly shows your WHOLE body.

You don't need to include a photo of you in a bikini or anything like that, but you do need to include a photo where you're dressed in clothes cut close enough to show what sort of body you really have, just as one face shot needs to demonstrate what you pretty much look like in person when you aren't making "duck face" or some other seductive look.

High-quality men are aware of the tricks many women play online to seem more attractive than they might be, and those men aren't going to give the time of day to a woman who engages in these dishonest practices.

3. Describe your passions.

If you're looking to find a high-quality man, then you need to care deeply about at least a couple of aspects of your life.

Talk about these passions in your profile. No high-quality man wants to date a woman who doesn't care about anything, no matter how "hot" she might be, and your profile offers a great opportunity to show you have a beating heart beneath your pretty face.

And remember, when demonstrating your passions in your profile, you need to write about what you care about in a passionate manner.

It isn't enough to simply say, "I like to help dogs at a local rescue shelter." You need to talk about why you love to volunteer your time in this manner, what brought you there and how it makes you feel.

A high-quality man wants a woman who cares deeply and isn't afraid of bearing at least a couple corners of her heart online.

4. Explain what you're looking for.

The number one way to find the man you're looking for is to describe what you're looking for in your profile.

The number one way to find men online is to explain what sort of relationship you're looking for.

Yes, you will alienate some men by being so specific, but the men you turn away with your honesty probably aren't the men you're actually looking for in the first place.

Those men who read through your explanation and want to meet with you are probably going to offer the traits and qualities you find attractive because they're also likely looking for the same sort of arrangement you desire.

Negotiating a Truce (at Christmas and for Other Special Occasions)

"There were calls for visits across the 'no man's land' where small gifts [between enemies] were exchanged."
~Wikipedia ("Christmas Eve")

God can shatter seemingly insurmountable barriers where two enemies cooperate.

This fact was graphically illustrated when opposing sides - the British and the Germans - agreed to a one-day truce on Christmas Eve, 1914. Troops on both sides were free to travel through the 'no man's land' between their respective trenches, to retrieve the recent dead and bury them, to sing Christmas carols, and eventually to exchange small gifts with their opposing numbers.

These 'enemies' met at one, during just one day, to share in a common humanity under God.

As the soldiers did - their front-line commanding officers in cahoots - we can arrange a truce in Jesus' name with those we have been warring with, or with those who have been warring with us.

This is no insignificant event to be achieved. For, differently to World War I, there may be the remote possibility of a revival between two warring parties. Isn't it fascinating of all those we war with, family may feature centrally?

COORDINATING A TRUCE

What might be impossible without bipartisan agreement is a blessing to all parties - not just the two protagonists - when it's achieved.

It starts from us, shelving and disposing of any feeling for dissension. Some may say, "C'mon, it's impossible to shelve and dispose of what we feel." But we can use our minds to discipline our hearts in remaining open, for a defined period. In this we must trust ourselves, first and foremost.

A truce is not hard when it is for an hour or two, a day or a few. Coordinating a truce requires the magnanimity of grace; that we would forego our need for 'respect' in order that the relationship would have the fighting chance it needs.

If the relationship is important enough, a truce, again for a time, is possible. This is because we are prepared to commit. If the other person considers the relationship important enough they, too, will be prepared to commit something when they see visible signs of our commitment. It must begin with us. Our grace must reach them. And we must be prepared to go beyond foreseeable lengths in order to achieve such a truce.

We will obviously need the support of close loved ones on our side of things. Without such support we may create unforeseeable conflict, and even make matters worse with those we already have loyal arrangements with.

***

If those who have fought in a world war have been able to negotiate a temporary truce in order to celebrate the peace and goodwill of Christmas, surely we are able to as well. It takes both parties, however, for such a truce to gain legs strong enough to stand. Such a truce is a blessing not only for the protagonists, but for the whole family, and others beyond.

© 2012 S. J. Wickham.



This article is brought to you by DATING.

Why He Didn't Call Back After the First Date

If you're like most women, you've probably been in the following situation: you had a wonderful date or two with a guy. You connected, you talked all night, you really felt like something could blossom between you two. It seemed like everything was going great! And then... he never called. What do you do? Why didn't he want to see you again? There are handful of reasons he may have run off, and you should know what they are so that you don't make the same mistakes again!

Don't Smother Him So Early
Men are not horribly complex creatures when it comes to this subject. If a girl seems too aggressive, needy or overbearing, he will lose interest very quickly. If you call him several times after the first date, or send him a mini-novel via text message, he's probably not going to respond. Perhaps you just want to say goodnight, or tell him what a great time you had. Resist the temptation! If he's interested, he will call you. It may take him a few days, but you can't force a guy to like you. You can, however, push him away by seeming clingy after only one or two dates!

Don't Make Your World Revolve Around Him
Most guys are focused on themselves. You should do the same! He has a career and friends, he has hobbies, he likes to watch sports with the guys or read a good book by himself some nights. You need to be as independent as he is. Don't make him feel like you can't live without him right away - that can be a LOT of pressure on a man! When you first start dating, make sure that you have your own social life. Spend time with friends and exercise your hobbies. Make sure he knows that you are your own person and that your entire world does not revolve around someone you've only been dating for a week or two! This can be threatening to a guy and make you come off desperate, which is extremely unattractive. Let him come after you, don't just hand him your schedule and let him take over!

Don't Move Too Fast for Him
You're probably looking for something more than just a quick fling - and he might be too! The problem here is that a lot of women will start waving their commitment flags right off the bat. This can easily scare a guy away. Keep in mind that the first few dates are a getting-to-know-you period and that he's not sitting there eating is chicken parmigiana waiting for you to ask whether or not he wants to have children. Chat about your job, about your favorite band or ask him where he got his tie. Don't jump right into heavy topics like family, politics or marriage. These things will come in time, and bringing them up prematurely may just scare him off.

The point here is to stay casual on your first few dates. Men can get spooked by an aggressive woman very easily. You may know what you want, but he probably doesn't, and you can't fault him for that. Take time to get to know each other and then discern whether or not this is a relationship worth taking further. It will progress naturally if you give it room to.

Wednesday, December 26, 2012

Effective Online Dating Tips for Men

There are a lot of tips and advice floating around on the internet about what to do and how to succeed in finding a partner through online dating and, these online dating tips for men can sometimes be useful. However, the sheer variety and unpredictability of situations that arise during dating situations can make certain tips unreliable or unusable in a lot of situations. In these cases, using a general statistically based approach to study what has been effective and what has failed on online dating can be useful in creating a more effective approach to the online dating conundrum.

Resources and Perspective Points

One good thing about collecting statistical information about it is that most are done over the computer and through online platforms like dating sites and services. Their business model actually depends on creating successful scenarios for this, most of these sites provide unique information about those that do succeed which can be used to create a more effective study on the subject. Tracking your own behavior as well as the behavior of other participants on the online dating scene can help you understand what is truly happening and how you can find compatible prospects easier by looking for telltale markers including behavior and preferences.

Statistical Analysis of Dating Data

There are several ways to analyze the data coming from sources like dating websites. However, because people are generally not easily defined through a default set of characteristics, it is always best to use the statistical data and these tips for men a guide that can help organize information about specific people and point out attractive and deal breaking factors as early as possible. Some of the most successful users of these analytical systems combine it or integrate it with regular relationship building techniques for a full effect.

Important Steps to Take

There are, of course, several ways to help improve the chances of building a successful relationship with the person that is statistically determined to be a probable match to you. For example, using a well written initial message that speaks to the actual common interests found between the two people are statistically more successful than random greetings or uninspired messages. Another important factor to actively know and regulate are the expectations of the other person and on how you yourself will perform during a meeting or a conversation. Knowing the limits can help make you more relaxed and at ease which can help with communicating a friendly and confident message and making use of online dating tips for men that apply to the situation.



This news article is brought to you by PARENTING KIDS - where latest news are our top priority.

The First 7 Steps to Heal a Broken Heart

What is a broken heart?

For me, a broken heart is that feeling you get when the thing you were so deeply hoping for doesn't happen. It's an enormous shock that can cause us a lot of pain. It is not just confined to a break-up with a lover; it can come from all sorts of relationships we have throughout our life.

Step 1: Acknowledge the Pain

When your heart is broken, acknowledge the feeling. This step is vital, because the depth of sadness and/or shock is huge and will never go away if it is not acknowledged. Many people avoid this with extreme behaviour - drink, drugs, new relationships, and it's got to be said that for some it seems that this works.

However, my own experience tells me to avoid extreme behaviour and aim to find much healthier ways to express what is going on. There are two solutions that I have used throughout out my life.

The first is to write. Every day for five minutes or any time that wave of pain and sometimes nausea overcomes you. Just jot down anything that comes out. Don't think about it and don't expect it to make sense. Then throw it away. It's important to throw it away so that you don't judge what you are doing. This has nothing to do with analyzing the situation. This is pure expression for that purpose only.

The second thing is that you need to move your body. This can be down at the gym, swimming, dancing in your living room. You need to keep your body moving.

The point of this step is not to deny what is going on but to find simple but healthy ways to let it out.

Step 2: Get Support from the Right People

When dealing with a broken heart you need to be aware of whom you are going to mix with. My experience dictates the following:

Friends

You need friends you can tell your story to. Preferably they shouldn't all know each other. That way you avoid the feeling that everyone's talking about you, and you also limit how boring your story might become if you repeat yourself too much to either one person or a group.

It is, however, very important to tell your story as many times as you want or need to. But try not to do it to the same people/group of people.

Avoiding Bad Influences

It is also important, at least in the beginning, to avoid any influences (drugs, alcohol, even some of your friends!) that are going to let you act impulsively, especially if that impulsiveness translates into you approaching the person/people who has/have broken your heart.

It's not a good idea because feelings of shame and guilt and that sick feeling in your stomach surely follow.

So although you may feel the freedom to party and go wild, I am suggesting, at least for the first three months, not to do this. That time will come but it's not yet.

Therapists

Get professional help. This time in our lives is a very raw period. And there is something so truthful and vulnerable about being such a bad way that makes it also a moment to seek help in the form of professional help.

It's important to note here that I'm not an advocate of therapy as something that someone does continually, but in these moments it is important to get help from someone who is outside of your life and who has no emotional attachment. This can be incredibly helpful.

These moments are the moments when everything is changing and professional support has a strong chance of giving you the information you need to move forward in the right way.

My own experience was to find a professional when I was at the lowest point of my experience because I truly thought I was going mad. If you feel this, then some form of professional help should be sought with the following three aims:

a) the first is to prevent you from actually going mad,
b) the second is to find ways to discuss what's going on and how to function (as we all must certainly do, despite what is going on)
c) the third is to delve deeper into ourselves and to start to sort out why we are where we are, and what we can do to look at and solve the deeper issues.

Therapy is not for everyone. It requires personal investment of resources both in terms of time and money. If you go down this route:

a) seek introductions to known therapists;
b) meet them and see how you work together - usually therapists will offer the first session free to establish this.

Alone time

It's important to have time alone and just be. Sadness and depression and pain are real and need to be felt. Things you can do on your own are reading, perhaps watching a TV series back to back, maybe even music etc.

For me, I could not stand to listen to any form of music. It made me feel sick. I stuck to watching the TV series - one I remember was 'The Wire', which I devoured most evening and weekends.

Being alone, at this stage, is vital. This is the space where without knowing it (and definitely not feeling it) you start to heal.

Step 3: Ritual

Ritual: We underestimate the importance of ritual. Of drawing lines in the sand, both happy lines and sad lines.

A broken heart offers many chances to bring ritual back.

But first why is ritual so important? It may be that the word ritual itself sounds a bit 'out there', but what I mean by ritual is stopping, acknowledging what is going on by making some kind of action and intention, leading to completion and the chance to move on.

We do this all the time with births, weddings, funerals etc. But these are very few instances in a life filled with almost constant change. Without taking a moment to stop, take stock, acknowledge, put a line in the sand, and move on, life appears to be a confused jumble of chaos.

In the West we have decided we have no time and, for the most part, we have lost the ability to even see these moments. They can be big moments but they can also be small moments. It's important not to sweat the small stuff, but it is equally important to recognize that the small stuff makes up the bigger stuff so acknowledge as much as you can.

However, we are discussing broken hearts and they fall into the category of the big moments. A very simple ritual is to do the following:
1. Make some time where you are on your own - about 20 minutes.
2. Light a candle.
3. Name the situation - what is going on for you - say it out loud. "I feel... "
4. Say what you want to come out of this time - feel safer, feel better, feel stronger. I'd like to feel... "
5. At the end of 20 minutes blow the candle out and say "I am exactly where I need to be and I am strong enough to deal with what is going on"

You can repeat this as often as you like. It is surprising what happens when you give a little space to acknowledge what is going on.

Step 4: It's all About Health

This step is all about health. There are four types of health that create a whole person - mental, physical, emotional, and spiritual health. And what I mean about spiritual health for this purpose is the human spirit - not necessarily a religious connotation.

Being truly healthy requires the upkeep of all of these areas. Imagine each of these four areas is a circle (i.e. four circles) and where they all touch the center is the level of your current health. So each circle, each of the four areas, needs to have attention so that the cumulative level of health is good.

However, a broken heart depletes energy very quickly. And each of the areas/circles will be low, possibly almost empty, at this point in life. My own experience is that the two areas that one can work on 'easiest' are physical health and spiritual health. This is because they are the most tangible.

Physical health: we all know that eating well and exercise keep us physically healthy. Never is this more true than when there is a broken heart involved. And yet it is also the time when it is difficult to care about physical health. If you can keep up a routine of physical exercise three times a week at least then go for it. Anything that pumps the heart and is repetitive ends up helping with a meditative state. It's hard to think too much when you've got to stay on the treadmill or keep in the right swimming lane. If you really have no energy then you really must go for at least three walks, preferably out in nature, every week. In addition eating is important and I found that in the first few months I relied on friends to feed me good food or I invited friends round so that I didn't just cook for one.

One thing you should also do, if you are not doing it already, is drink a lot of water.

Spiritual health: this is thinking about how you lift your own spirit. What keeps you interested in what's going on? Is it a good book, films, going to open mic nights, meditating, dancing, roller skating, painting, writing poetry, writing ditties, dyeing clothes? This is the creative part of you that can never die and holds the key to being able to lift you up. Many of us give up this side of life at school when we are told we will never be a painter or a writer etc. And we simply give it up.

So if you don't know what will do this for you, think about what you used to do when you were a kid. Think about the times you felt lighter. What were you doing? This doesn't have to big things, it can be very small things that you don't have to tell anyone you are doing - like writing poetry.

Step 4 is beginning to take responsibility and see what choices you have. These two 'circles' of health will help the other two (mental and emotional health) to gather energy.

Step 5: Building Self-confidence

It's time to really start to look at building self-confidence which, let's be honest, has been knocked, even if we are 'appearing' fine.

It's so hard to understand why things don't work out. No, actually usually it's impossible to understand which is why we feel mad for quite some time after a relationship stops. So the best thing is to really be gentle with yourself and understand that you may never understand why something didn't work out and the more you think about it the harder you are going to be on yourself. Easily said. Which is why it's important to focus on how you start to feel better about yourself. We've already talked about exercise and keeping your body moving. We now need to focus on changing how you look. It's a very strange thing to start to look after your body and give it the best chance it has to look great. But it really works. And that doesn't matter if you are tall, short, voluptuous, skinny, etc, etc. This is not about wanting to be something else, this is about using what you've got and using it to your best ability - basically making the most of what you have.

Here's how:

1. Skin. The biggest organ you have, and it needs looking after. If you don't have a skin regime you need to have one, but I appreciate that it can't start with all the things that a beauty consultant might want you to start with (it's over-powering if you have never had a skin regime). So for those who can't do it all, a gentle exfoliator used in the bath for your face, serum and a moisturizer when you get out. For your body a shower gel with exfoliation and a cream to rub on. It'll take an extra 3-4 minutes and it will make a difference. I bathe a lot as I love water and it calms me down. I put a few drops of olive oil in my bath to cover my body's moisturisation.

2. Clothes. Clothes, their shape, their colour, make such a difference. If you can get a stylist for a day (and most of us can't) some department stores have in-house shoppers who are free. Watching programmes on shapes etc will also help. The reason you need to this is you need to see yourself through someone else's eyes and you need to understand what works with your shape. Then you get a good friend around (make sure it's someone who you trust to be tactful but honest), pull out your wardrobe and try things on. Get rid of things that don't work, and put 'outfits' together. Putting outfits together is so helpful on the mornings that you feel ugly and horrible. You pull one of these outfits on, don't look in the mirror, and leave. You'll be surprised how this really starts to build up your confidence. Stop wearing all the black and grey stuff and get yourself upgraded. It is important to note that it costs nothing to go through your wardrobe, and it is recommended before going shopping.

3. Hair. The crowning glory. Well kept hair is fundamental to looking good. Good haircuts kept up, colour put in if you are going grey, a change of colour - all give an extraordinary feeling of freedom. Who are you anyway? Who do you want to be? Hair is a way to try out new looks and push those boundaries that we often get trapped in while in relationships.

4. Nails. Whether you bite your nails or grow them easily having nails done or at least tidy is really important, so if you can afford it, do it, if not learn to shape and paint your nails (practice). Often these new voucher schemes offer the chance to have nails done cheaply. Don't forget your feet, at least in the summer. What a difference a pedicure makes.

Remember. This is not about other people. This is about you starting to acknowledge that you are a person with energy to share. Making yourself look better only makes you feel better and you can do this without actually 'feeling' better. What I mean by this is that it's an action process that doesn't require you to 'feel' good about doing it, it just requires you to follow the steps above and this process will pull you forward. Good luck and keep at it.

Step 6: The Power of You

There is a very fundamental understanding that needs to be reached on what power you have within your life. Much is written about the choices we have and the choices we make. Much is written about blame and responsibility.

The truth is that it's easy to blame others and external situations for one's downfall. But what happens if we blame others all the time is that what we are saying is that because we had nothing to do with what went on, we will never be able to change anything. So though blame is an easy option to begin with, what you are actually doing in the long term is abdicating any chance of changing you situation. After all if it's nothing to do you with you, you don't have to do anything, right?

Wrong. Or at least wrong if you want to have a life that you have control over.

And this is where it gets a bit complicated. What you actually need to do is take responsibility for your own life. The complicated bit is that this does NOT mean blaming yourself for what has gone on. This is equally unhelpful. What you do by taking is responsibility is to pose the first question which is 'what can I do to change things for the better?'

So here comes the responsibility that you have to yourself. You have the absolute power to decide how you react to what happens to you. To be clear. This does not mean that you can change what will happen to you. It means that you can change how you react to what happens to you. It may seem almost insignificant, but actually the power in this subtle but dramatic change is extraordinary.

For now, in step 6, watch how you react to what happens to you and think, and try to react differently.

Step 7: The Spiral of Life.

I've noticed that some things happen to some people that never happen to me. Or even, the same things happen to me that I've never heard of happening to anyone else. Patterns seem to exist everywhere. And if patterns exist, then they can be changed.

In Step 6, I talked about the main choice we all have to change the way we react to what happens to us. In many ways what we do by changing our reaction is to change a pattern.

However, it does seem that the fundamental aspects of our own individual patterns don't disappear. This means that it seems likely that throughout you will have the same patterns; what happens if you choose to change how you react to them is that the pattern loses its intensity. It's as if each time you choose a different and better way to react you give yourself the chance to see the bigger picture.



This article is brought to you by DATING.

Understanding How Speed Dating Works

Have you ever thought about the possibility of getting into speed dating? This is something which has surely grown very popular recently and is certainly a benefit for people who are looking to socialize but barely have time to go out on a real, personal, one-on-one date. it's also something which makes it possible for individuals to look at many different dating prospects at the same time at an fixed time frame.

Certainly, the first you'd wish to know is how it all works. Therefore, you may like to relax your mind and not have to worry about anything, since below are some things you'll be glad to know concerning how does speed dating work.

1) As stated earlier, this has received a whole lot of popularity as of late, and is very an alternative to normal dating. These are often planned by some organizers, and it'd be pretty easy for you to keep track of any events in your area, most especially with the advent of the Internet. It goes without saying; you may also want to look into entering or joining speed dating sessions which are appropriate for your age.

2) You'll be spending a short amount of time meeting various people every time. How it works is that you'll be going to one table to talk to the individual who may end up being your potential date for around 3-4 minutes. This will be enough time for you to know even just a bit about the individual, and help you find out if there's any spark between you two. Once the time's up, you will then proceed to the next table and get to know the other person.

3) The entire thing is pretty similar to a checklist. if you realize that you like the individual you're talking to and would like to spend a bit more time with them right after the speed dating, you simply have to tick their name & number on the slip given to you.

4) There are many different ways in which speed dating organizers will notify you on the progress of the prospects you have ticked. you may get a text message via mobile phone to figure out if you're also been ticked by some of your chosen prospects. Through this, you'll get to exchange numbers, email addresses, Facebook accounts and other contact details too.

These are a few tips on how does speed dating work. It's fun, and gives you the opportunity to meet various individuals all at once, proving to be one of the most rewarding experiences ever.

Monday, December 24, 2012

Divine 'I', The Soul Integrates With Money, Property, Social Status And Ego To Become A Social I

I am:

'I', the soul,

my name,

my relations,

my chair,

my money,

my goods,

and my property.

As long as 'I' am alive,

my ego feeds on,

money, property, status in society, intelligence,

and pride in own race, culture, religion, region and nation;

but at a huge cost to humanity:

violence over disagreements,

broken homes, broken nations and wars.

I continue to survive,

even after 'I' has died.

When 'I' retire,

I am less my chair.

When 'I' die,

I do not die,

I less 'I', am shared,

among my wife and children.

I am alive in their memory,

in the property, the goods, the money;

till,

the goods are there,

and property is there.

Later when,

the goods are no more good,

& the property is sold

to facilitate equitable distribution of assets.

I less 'I', am still not dead,

I exists,

in the heart of my not-so-young, still alive sweet-heart,

in sweet memories of sweeter moments,

in my wedding album.

Thereafter,

this unwanted extra luggage too,

is dumped unceremoniously,

then, I less 'I',

am dead physically.

Still..

I continue to live in the memory of my children.

I am alive in my name,

uttered by my children,

once in a while,

'how simpleton he was'.

Beyond my grand-children,

my name evaporates.

Now I am dead in totality,

unless I become a part of history,

due to my goodness or otherwise,

to prolong my existence in the memory of humanity.

Thereafter,

I am an 'emptiness' in the universe,

who never existed in the world,

originated from emptiness, back to emptiness.

In the transit period,

during my stay in this world,

I, my religion, my culture, my language, my country,

were the best;

I fought for these.

Now in my death,

'I' still burdened with,

my irrelevant long dead ego,

in the emptiness around me,

'I' search for my past earthly identity in vain;

the pride in my family, my culture, my religion, my nation,

'I' find none,

for none is created by God.

The duality of man-made concepts,

in God made humanity vanishes,

into nothingness, emptiness,

and 'I' am in His world,

since 'I' was dead,

waiting for next round,

call it 'rebirth'

or 'the day of judgement'.

How does these man-made concepts matter,

after death?

Man- made boundaries of race, gender, region, nations,

are effective as long as we are alive.

A dead militant,

a dead person:

white or black, Aryan or non-aryan,

Israeli or Palestinian, Protestant or Catholic,

Osama Bin Laden or Mother Theresa,

are irrelevant to humanity,

except for the memory,

they leave, to humanity.

Animals do not believe in concept of,

nations, race, religion, gender superiority and family relations.

Is humanity a loser in the bargain?



This news article is brought to you by STOCK MARKET BLOG - where latest news are our top priority.

Using a Free Online Dating Website to Meet a Date

The places that you can get to when finding dates can come in many forms. Some of the best ones that you can go to are free to handle. These places make for some exciting options to see when looking to date online singles.

Finding online dates can be great to do online because it makes it easier for you to find people in your local area. This is also to make it easier for you to find them without having to deal with all the pressures that are associated with going out in public just to find someone. Going online for dates is easy to handle and can involve a controlled environment that might be easier for you to work with.

The thing about going to a free online dating website is that you will be able to simply have an easier time with showing yourself to more people. This can be done by communicating with others by posting your profile online and by posting a recent photo of yourself as well.

This can be done to easily make it so you can promote yourself to other people. In fact, you can create a full profile that includes everything anyone might be interested in learning about with regards to who you are. This could be used on free dating websites to let people know more about you.

You can use one of these free dating services to find people and to get in touch with them. You can use your free profile to communicate with a number of online singles through a number of different avenues. These include spots like by email, through an instant message or even through a private chat feature found on the website. These are options that single free women and men can take advantage of when finding others.

What's even more interesting is that a single free men or women website can cater to specific groups depending on what you go to. There are sites dedicated to people with different interests or people with different ethnicities. The options you have to choose from are varied so it's a good idea to search around to see what you can get yourself into while visiting one of these sites.

It should be noted that some of the online dating sites that are available for free will charge you money for some things. These include things like video chats, special message templates and even the ability to store multiple pictures of yourself or to make your profile a featured profile on the site. Fortunately, these are all optional charges. You do not have to go along with these charges if you do not feel like you want to use them while on one of these websites.

It's a good idea to find free dating sites that allow you to meet others in your area for nothing. These sites can provide you with all of the necessary things that you need so you can get in touch with singles that you might be very interested in meeting.



This news article is brought to you by FREE ROMANTIC DATING SITE BLOG - where latest news are our top priority.

The Basics On How To Flirt With A Girl

Can't get a girlfriend? Maybe you should step up your flirting game. Why is flirting important? It's a tease. It's the sexual tension that stirs the relationship. It's playful and fun. It keeps you on your toes because you have to be funny and witty and create that spark. It also creates a want and need in her mind. She's flirting with you because it gets excited and it makes her want to be with you.

The truth is that most men have no idea how to flirt, and when they start flirting, they do it in a way that makes them lose their mystery. To get a girl, it helps to be a great flirter. It does take a lot of practice. With flirting you can't be be too subtle because your point might not hit its target or she will misread your intentions. If your flirting is not hitting the target it might be because you haven't done it enough or you haven't had enough practice. If you don't know how to flirt naturally, then you should definitely learn, because flirting should be fun not embarrassing.

Flirting does take time and you'll stumble a couple times, but with practice and learning from your mistakes you can develop a great flirt game. Once you get a hang on how flirting goes, it'll open up all kinds of doors for you. Now let's take a look at some steps to remember while you are getting your flirt game together.

The Laid Back Flirt

When you are being laid back, you're playing it cool and not looking desperate. You're giving off answers and responses that make you come off as being a level headed guy that can be funny as well. This makes women think they could feel safe around you. Point scored, you might end up leaving with her if she completely trusts you. Avoid being too obvious with how you flirt too. Don't say what is the most obvious thing to say when flirting. What does that exactly mean? For example:

NON-PLAYFUL WAY

Girl: I love pasta. It's my favorite / Guy: We should go out and eat some pasta sometime.

Could this work? Sure, but it's also an obvious answer, plus there is no playful banter or excitement with this.

BETTER WAY

Girl: I love pasta. It's my favorite / Guy: It depends. Is it Chef Boyardee? I can make a mean plate of some Chef Boyardee sometime.

This gives a little humor in the flirting. The guy can also open into "I can microwave you up a bowl sometime if you like". Asking her out on a date, but being funny about it.

Girl: I love pasta. It's my favorite: / Guy: How do you feel about making some pasta for people you just meet?

Again, some more banter and playfulness with this flirt.

Women love a good challenge, which is why it helps you to be laid back. Don't open up and talk her ear off. Keep them guessing on who you are. Be a puzzle that just has to be solved. If there is no challenge, there is no fun. If you are relaxed and come off as confident, all of the sudden you become sexier, more attractive and more intriguing.

Being Elusive

Be a mystery. Don't reveal yourself too much. Let them work at getting to know who you are. The one problem guys have while flirting is that they let the cat out of the bag. They reveal too much while they should be holding back for the girl to make all the moves. Let's say you are flirting with someone that seems to be into you. No need to rush into spilling over your whole life story. You already have their attention. Learn to be patient and let the conversation and playfulness come out.

It's going to take practice and won't happen over night. Sometimes you talk your head off because you are so bottled up inside. You have all these things to say, but no one to hear them then once you find someone into you, you talk and talk and talk. Hold back on those initial feelings and just have fun with it. Have fun with the idea that someone is playfully talking to you and enjoying it at the same time.

Put A Time Limit On

Timing is everything. If you don't notice the time limit on something it can hurt your chances. Depending on how the flirting is going don't flirt for too long. It will make you look needy. Going back to the point of being elusive, that's what you need to be. Have the appearance of having to be somewhere else or having to talk to someone else. If you flirt with her for too long then it might come across as you needing to talk to someone and she is just that person. You might end up scaring her off with all the neediness you displaying.

You have to be able to read the body language and the overall situation. If the flirting is going really well then you can either try and leave on a high note and get her name/number before leaving. Or continue to talk. If I find someone engaging then I'll keep up the conversation and talk until I feel it coming to an end. I try and get a name/number (if I want it) and then I leave the conversation.

Here's an interesting situation, let's say you meet at a party or a friends get together. You start flirting with someone and make a connection. You can always leave and then come back again because you know she's going to be around. It gives you the opportunity to walk around as well and find someone else to talk to. If you don't end up finding someone, then you know you can go back to her.

Also, this will feed into the jealousy factor of it because you'll be going around trying to talk to other women. Just glance over and see if she's watching. If she looks over and catches a glimpse at you talking to another girl then you know she's interested.

Now that we've covered some important steps you will have to put your whole act together. Be ready. Make it a fun game for yourself. Always be out there trying new things. Talking to people. Being on your feet in a conversation. All this comes with time and practice and especially some confidence.

Sunday, December 23, 2012

The Number One Way To Make A Girl Jealous

Jealousy is a very powerful weapon. When not used correctly, this weapon could destroy the one person who is handling it, and you definitely don't want that to be you. But it can also be a great tool and help you if you find yourself stuck in the friend zone. We're going to cover understanding jealousy, a warning about it and also the number 1 best way to get a girl jealous.

Jealousy is a very powerful emotion. That is why you should use it wisely and rarely, only when you feel the absolute need to use it. When is the best time to use jealousy?

  • When someone whom you like seems to be distracted by someone else and you would like to regain their attention
  • When the person you love seems to get distant, you will fear that you will lose them and you will start to push harder

When people are caught up in the jealousy web, you could say that the jealousy is what keeps a connection. There's a problem with this. If you make someone too jealous, especially a girl, she might not be able to handle the stress and pressure and fight back. No one likes to be made a fool. A little jealousy can go a long way and that can end up nasty. In the end both people lose.

Knowing the Jealousy Phases

  • In the beginning, the man does not seem interesting to the woman. She has no feelings at all for him.
  • If jealousy is created by the guy, she begins to be possessive and interested about him.
  • At the peak, when she can't stand the jealousy. She becomes very possessive and very attracted to that male.
  • If the jealousy continues without being satisfied it will have a reverse effect. Her feelings will turn sour. She might become vengeful and possibly find some way to hurt you in return for hurting her.

You have to be able to sense which phase she is in to be able to use the jealousy as a tool. She might do the same to you and turn the jealousy on you. Some womn are able to sense when they the jealousy games start getting played.

Warning: The Abuse of Power

When you use the power of jealousy too much, it will cost you. You will end up single and no woman will ever speak to you because she will know what kind of tricks you like to play. That's right. Jealousy is not to be tampered with. I think that everybody has experienced or knows of a person that uses jealousy to play people. At first it works, but then after a while you start calling their bluffs. You start to see it in their nature. Those are the people to look out for. They have a taste of how powerful jealousy can be, but don't be that person. Don't abuse it. Use jealousy wisely or else you will end up the jealous one.

Create A Connection

You have to interact and make a connection with someone to make them jealous first. This might seem like it's a no-brainer, but there are some people out there that are trying to make someone jealous and they are getting totally ignored. Why is that? Because the person that they are trying to make jealous doesn't even know they're alive. You can't make someone jealous if they have nothing to be jealous over.

The only way to create a connection is the start putting yourself out there. Start up some small talk, look at each other from across the room and smile, or just open yourself up a little. Once you create that, you can start building on it. For a good read check out our article, What Makes An Average Guy Instantly Become Hot, for tips on how to create a connection.

Getting Her Attention The Wrong Way

Jumping up and down saying "look at me!" and trying desperately to have her look your way does NOT work. Most people do this. They don't realize they're doing it, but it's there. Desperation can be smelled a mile away. Avoid it because you'll be looking like a fool.

#1 Technique: Ignoring Her

That's right. Ignoring her is the #1 technique. Most women loved to be adored and they're used to getting a lot of attention. They know they have that power and they know how to use it. If you take that power away from them, then they want to get it back. So they'll make all attempts to get it back.

The only thing with this technique is that you have to have some kind of connection with her. You could have been engaged in some small talk (and hopefully flirting with her at the same), maybe you caught eyes across the room and smiled at each other. That could also be a connection. It's very small, but at least there is something there. If you feel that there is some kind of attraction on her end, then just stay in viewing distance, but talk to other people and have a great time! If she is noticing where you're going or who you're going to talk to, this is drives women crazy.

Women like to be shown attention so it hurts a little that you aren't showing her the attention she wants. Sooner or later you do have to talk to her to try and not let the jealousy get out of hand or fade away. You have to know when to finally cash in and don't let it get away from you.

When you are trying to play the jealousy card don't forget the object of your obsession. Don't forget that SHE is the one you are trying to make jealous, not other girls. If you want jealousy to work keep in mind:

  • Don't play jealousy tricks on women who are not interested in you
  • Don't do it either with women who already like you more than a lot

Use jealousy only on indecisive women you want to attract and make sure those women know you, or else jealousy will be in vain. Keep your game up and soon enough women will be chasing you. From time to time, jealousy is the right medicine for the illnesses of love.



This article is brought to you by DATING SERVICE.

Get Your Ex Back - Advice to All Heart Broken People

After a break up, the most common thing you would to is to approach your friends. Your friends will tell you not to worry and promise that they would get your ex back. Advice on this issue will be given in plenty among which only some may work and some may worsen the condition.

It is vital for you remember some things to be done and some things to avoid when trying to get your ex back. Advice to all broken heart is - be patient and work towards it. Here are some tips in this regard.

Before you start to take any action, be sure that you ex did not have any shoulder to fall back, or she was not sure of your relationship or she was not happy with you. In all these cases - there is not going to be much success.

The first thing to avoid is to plead or beg for another chance. This might work sometimes, but the love that comes out of sympathy or guilt will never last long and will end in failure again. Do not go behind your partner trying to show that you still have love and affection for them. There is nothing worse than stalking them. This could irritate them and end up in an unpleasant situation. Make sure that you stay away from them. Letting them spend their time in loneliness would make them remember the moments of your love. This is due to the fact that, it would take some time to ignore the things they have accustomed to.

The next piece of advice will be, when they make contact after some period of missing you, make sure you maintain a confident and friendly attitude. Do not express that you have been torn to pieces because of missing them. Have a friendly chat and never flirt nor pull up emotional talks unless they start off the topic. Make a conversation that would create interest in you and make them to long for you. If you have managed to kick off a fun filled conversation, you have succeeded in getting closer to your task.

After that, you would have opportunity to spend time with them. This is the stage where you have to be patient and wait for them to open up their emotional component. Hear them out completely and try to solve the issue to get your ex back. Advise them about the various misunderstandings and lead a happy life.



This article is brought to you by DATING SERVICE.