No matter how or why a relationship ends, it can be extremely painful. The pain from a breakup can break a heart and pierce a person straight to their soul making them feel as if their world is crumbling down around them. This type of hurt is very difficult to endure and even more difficult to get over.
There is no prescribed amount of time it takes to truly get over the loss of love. As love is such a volatile emotion, the time it takes to recover from a loss of love depends on the amount of damage that resulted from the loss. Further, some people are so caught up in the pain and emotions of the loss that they don't even know where or how to start the healing process.
If this sounds like you, if all you can think of is "I miss my girlfriend," then continue reading because this is for you and you are not here by accident. The purpose of this is to get you past your heartache and give you the strength to go forward.
First and foremost, it's important to understand that what you're feeling is natural and it is OK to acknowledge it. As men, we have a tendency to mask how we feel when our heart is broken because that's the macho thing to do. Society has taught us that showing emotions of hurt or sadness is synonymous with showing weakness. It's not. In fact, masking or bottling in emotions can be more harmful than anything. Talk about how you feel with a good friend, cry even. You benefit because that friend may be able to offer some very helpful advice and crying, believe it or not, is a great release and you typically feel relieved afterwards.
Get out and do the things you may not have done as much when you were in your relationship. Pamper yourself. Enjoy some nights out with the guys. Participating in activities you enjoy will help take your mind off your love loss and eventually assist you in getting past it and over her.
Eventually, you should get yourself back in the dating game. Before doing that, however, you need to get out all of your old feelings for your ex out of your system. Now this is not done by calling or emailing her as all that will do is bring her back into your life and send you right back to square one... it's very counterproductive. Instead, write her a letter and lay everything out there, how much you miss her, how badly you were hurt by her. Also include all the things she did that really got on your nerves and why you're glad that the relationship is over. Do not mail this to her, however, remember the goal is not to bring her back into your life; the goal is to get over her. So, instead of mailing the letter out to her, burn it. The burning of the letter symbolizes you finally laying everything out there, getting all the "I miss my girlfriend" out of your system, and letting it all dissolve into the universe, releasing you from the burden of carrying those emotions with you any longer.
We can always recover from the loss of love, as long as we don't lose the love we have for ourselves. Remembering this and following the advice laid out here will help to put you back in a good place with yourself and your love life.
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