Tuesday, February 5, 2013

Make Valentine's Day the Day to Save Your Relationship

Aren't new relationships the best?! This new person is suddenly the most important person in your life and you want to spend as much time as possible with them - even if it means missing out on everything else!

After awhile though, that "honeymoon" phase starts to wear off. As it does, you and your sweetie become more comfortable with one another and you start fitting each other into your daily routines - instead of rearranging your entire lives to be with each other.

That's not a bad thing though. In fact, it's a sign that your relationship is moving to the next level. After all, anyone can be infatuated for a little while, but it takes a special person to make you settle down and work at a mature relationship.

As that mature relationship moves forward, you just might fall in love. Don't rush it though! Legitimately falling in love takes time. However, it's time well-spent because falling in love is one of the best experiences you can have!

But no matter how much you and your sweetie love each other, you're going to go through difficult periods. It doesn't mean you're not meant to be; it's simply part of life.

If you want to make sure you don't let those difficult times get the best of you - especially as Valentine's Day draws nearer - here's what you can do to get your relationship back on track:

1. Assess the problem.

Don't focus on one specific argument. Instead, sit down as a couple and see what the underlying issue is. After all, those arguments are coming from SOMEWHERE. Until you figure out exactly what the problem is, you can't fix it.

Don't assume it's something major though. Some relationships fall victim to lots of little things that pile up as time goes by. Just because you haven't had an end-all-be-all blowout doesn't mean there's not a problem somewhere.

2. Talk to each other.

Successful relationships are the ultimate team effort. Neither one of you can do everything all by yourself. If you're going to overcome your problem, you're going to have to do it together - and that means talking to each other.

Don't talk AT each other though. State your point of view and then genuinely listen to your partner. Really try to see things from your sweetie's perspective. The sooner you can understand where the other person is coming from, the sooner you can fix things.

3. Make sure you're still in love.

Sometimes, people fall out of love. It happens and it doesn't make you a bad person. If the problem is that the love simply isn't there anymore, all of the talking in the world isn't going to help.

However, if the two of you still love each other, it's important to take note of it. As long as the love is alive, there is still hope for your relationship. Loving someone doesn't automatically guarantee a successful relationship (you have to work at it, too!), but it's certainly the motivation you need to put in the work!

The longer you wait to address your relationship issues, the harder it's going to be to fix them. Don't just commit to fixing them because Valentine's Day is coming up. Instead, use Valentine's Day as a great excuse to jump-start your communication. That way, you really can have the best Valentine's Day ever!

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