How to Turn on a Woman

I wish a woman is like a light bulb that can be turned "on" or "off" at the flick of a switch.

If that is possible, my fingers would have been worn to a stub by now.

And it will remove the excitement and sense of accomplishment of the chase; make sex so banal it would become no different from that of the lower levels of creation - bam, bam, bam and it's over.

Sex is always pleasurable - be it with a whore or with the woman of your fantasies. The big difference is that the former leaves a bad taste in your mouth (and probably an itch in your genitals), while the later gives you total and unadulterated satisfaction. Provided, of course, that you have laid down the ambience for a perfect sync between you and your partner

How to get in sync with your woman:

Turning on a woman is an art. There are no set rules except that: First, it is an expression of the artist of his model, and, second, practice makes perfect.

So if you have been a fumbling idiot in the past, don't despair. Learn from your mistakes and keep at it. Someday you will become so adept, you can turn on a woman like you turn on a light bulb.

To help you along, remember these tested and proven approaches:

- Create chemistry:

In an hour or so bus ride from Taoyuen to Taipeh, Taiwan, I sat beside a very attractive Taiwanese woman. But she spoke no English and my Mandarin was next to nothing. When we got to Taipeh, instead of going shopping, she took me straight to a hotel where we had great sex the entire morning. And had more when we got back to my hotel in the afternoon.

That was chemistry.

Establishing chemistry needs full use of your senses to detect the slightest nuances of an eye contact, a glance, a smile, or a hearty response to a short "hi".

These are like doors left ajar. When you spot these, seize the moment. It may never come again.

- Succumb her with good conversation:

Some women are hesitant, defensive or even suspicious to strike up a conversation with a man they just met. But with a little persistence sprinkled with humor and wit, practically all will succumb to it.

Slant the conversation to her physical attributes, career, interests, family and relationships.

What you get from these will give a hint whether to open the door a little more or close it carefully.

Warning: Unless you want to sleep with your pillow between your legs and a hard-on a bag of ice can't cure, never, ever dwell on yourself, i.e., how good you are; your fat bank book, your car, or sports or your women. You will be kissing your chances goodbye.

- Invest:

There is no such thing as a "free ride". Even your wife needs some incentives and motivation.

You have to spend money and time to turn on a woman you desire. Some are really worth it, while others can be written off as a gambling loss.

It doesn't have to be expensive; neither should it be the likes of a fast food chain. Something in between that can set the mood for good conversation while slipping in, furtively, your intentions.

As crazy as it sounds, liken it to buying a pair of shoes. Some pair is best taken from second-hand stores while others from a boutique. Let your gut do the thinking, not your wallet.

- Experiment with skin contact:

Some women love to touch, while others cringe at the slightest skin contact. The former are easier to deal with while the latter takes a little more effort.

There is something with skin contact that speaks louder than words. It conveys acceptance, friendliness, warmth and trust. Above all, it communicates intent.

I recently met a woman, who, at 46 yrs of age, is still very attractive. And she's very intelligent, too. Separated from her hubby for years, she could have been right for the picking. But she does not like to go to the beach (which I like), she doesn't go out at night (which I do) and, the clincher, she doesn't want to be touched, which I craved for.

Our friendship lasted less than a week.

Chasing after a woman (or women), is very interesting and challenging if you don't have much scruples. It is not for those who get too hung-up with feelings of guilt or those who can't take "No" for an answer. And you will have lots of it. Even Brad Pitt and Tom Cruise can't have it a hundred percent.

But if she is really worth it and your intentions are noble, getting her to say "Yes" builds the foundation for lasting and meaningful relationships.

This article is brought to you by PERSONALS.